How many times have you forgone what you really wanted because you were too afraid to ask? In this week’s episode of Reflect Forward: Advice Form a CEO, I encourage you to just go for it. Ask for what you want. So what if you get a “no” in response? If you don’t ask, you’ve already told yourself “no” anyway.
Look, I get that there are many convincing reasons why you shouldn’t ask for what you want. You don’t want to seem pushy, needy, or high maintenance. You fear rejection; you’ll be embarrassed if you get a no. You don’t want to make your boss/spouse/coworker uncomfortable or, even worse, mad. You feel like what you want is obvious and that you shouldn’t HAVE to ask. Or maybe you don’t think you deserve to get what you really desire. There are a million excuses not to ask for what you want, but they are just that: EXCUSES. So stop making them and start asking.
Easier said than done, right? Here’s how to ask for what you want.
1. Get Clear on What You Want
The more clarity you can have about what you want and why you want it, the easier it is to ask.
2. Know Who to Ask
If you ask the wrong person (or people), you’re bound to get a no. Or get a yes that can’t be delivered upon.
3. Think about Your Body Language
Don’t slouch, mumble, cross your arms, or look at the ground.
4. Be Direct and Specific about What You Want
Don’t beat around the bush, hem and haw, or expect people to read your mind.
5. Always Be Gracious
Acknowledge with gratitude what the other person will have to do to give you a yes.
So what do you do if you get a no?
Getting told “no” can be hard to take. You may feel a wide range of emotions and want to lash out, shut down, or give up. Don’t. Everyone gets told no, and it may take some time to work through your disappointment, and that’s okay.
And yes, there is such a thing as asking for too much too often. Don’t be the person who always asks for favors.
Life is too short not to ask for what you want. It may sound macabre to put in a blog like this, but the reality is that it all could be over at any minute. So why not put it out there and ask? You might just surprise yourself and get what you ask for!
Question of the Week?
What are you reading right now?
Think Like a Monk by Jay Shetty. It’s a great book on staying present and grounded and how to lessen your attachment to things and outcomes. Tune in to find out more about why I love this book!
Or check out my new YouTube Channel, where you can watch full-length episodes of Advice From a CEO!
And if you are looking for a keynote speaker or a podcast guest, click here to book a meeting with me to discuss what you are looking for!