In this week’s episode, I talk about how to create boundaries around your work, not just for you but your team as well and why not doing so can be a form of numbing.
Two weeks ago, I held a planning and team-building session with my executive management team. We all read Berne Brown’s book “Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts” and had an enlightening conversation about Armored Leadership vs. Daring Leadership.
Berne covers two models of leadership. The first she labels “Armored Leadership,” a style of leadership defined by characteristics such as driving perfectionism and fostering fear, working from scarcity and squandering opportunities for joy and recognition, and being a knower and being right. These have a profoundly negative effect in the workplace, creating fear, uncertainly, and disengagement.
Alternatively, leaders can embrace daring leadership, which is essentially the opposite of armored leadership. Examples include Modeling and encouraging healthy striving, empathy, and self-compassion, practicing gratitude and celebrating milestones and victories, and being a learner and getting it right.
As my team began talking about daring vs. armored leadership, something interesting came up: comparing numbing (armored leadership) and setting boundaries and finding REAL comfort (daring leadership). We explored how perhaps we were numbing by taking on too much and not setting real boundaries about what we say yes to and what we say no to.
I loved this conversation – it was real and deep. We explored tradeoffs: slowing down to speed up and building internal infrastructure vs. driving new revenue streams. We talked about how it’s sometimes easier to just say “yes” to taking on extra work without exploring what we will stop doing. And how numbing can mean so much more than what we typically think: using substance, food, and screens to distract ourselves from what’s making us miserable.
This was such a great exercise and an excellent way to explore Dare to Lead. Tune in to find out more!
Question of the Episode
This week’s question came from a friend of mine. She asked, “you always seem so joyful. Can you tell me what you do? How do you find so much joy and happiness in life? What can I do?
During this episode, I share five things to do to find joy in these crazy times: move my body and eat a salad every day, meditate on feelings of gratitude, focus on my purpose, be kind to everyone I interact with, and focus on building stronger relationships. Tune in for the details!
Like this? Check out my blog on five things I wished I knew before becoming a CEO.